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Friday, October 21, 2016

Why Am I Still On This Blog? (A question I asked myself as I read through my entries)

         Hiya, thought you'd seen the last of me huh? Well surprise! As a note, I'm sorry you can't get rid of me just yet Mrs. Joyner. So, either you read the title or you're genuinely wondering what the frick frack paddy wack I'm doing back on here and I'll answer in a second.

       Okay, so as I'm typing this I'm in study hall (just came from Spanish class) (edit: if you're new then you don't know that i tend to procrastinate and booyy i did that a lot on this thing. It's October 15ht and I started this last month heh, take it away past me!) , and in during both these classes I read my last entry (if you haven't read it, I think you should read it first I guess to understand I dunno) and I just wanted to give myself a shout out for being a liar. A humongus, rude, liar.

My time in Golf (and Hynes) wasn't trash (mostofthetime). In fact I prefer being there now than when I used to actually be in 8th grade. I am so sorry to everyone that thinks I was shaming Golf. And this isn't a "pity" post either. It's just calling myself out.

      Alright! Now that you know that much let me backtrack and rephrase everything.

The time I spent in golf was a range from frustrating to the best time ever. See 8th grade me? That wasn't so hard to admit was it? Right, so over the summer and even a couple of minutes ago I had time to think over what happened at the school. From the times where I would put white-out on my nails with Ariana because I was distracted in Mrs.Nelsons class to the time where Micah and Mercedes were waving at me from front row seats for the eighth grade play. Through 95% of the time that I was at golf middle school (which means from fifth grade until the last two weeks of eighth grade) I was depressed. Now it's weird for me to say that because a while back I thought I was "cured" but I wasn't and in all honesty now that I realize that, it makes my life so much easier. I'm going to revise my intro to my other graduation speech.

Hi, my name is Carolina. I'm 15 years old and when I was in sixth grade I hated everything "normal" for a girl to like. I hated dresses and skirts and pretty pastel colors. I really didn't like One Direction, Justin Bieber (some thing don't change trust me I still don't like him), super happy songs, and I hated living. I hated the thought of being fifteen one day because that meant a quinceanera was bound to happen, I hated going to church because religion was being shoved down my throat and I didn't want to be part of the religion if I had bad memories.

Well joke's on you past self because guess what? I love skirts and dresses, I love pastel colors (THEY'RE TOO PRETTY FOR THEIR OWN GOOD OKAY), I'm okay with One direction, and most of all I'm having a quinceanera. Isn't life funny that way? And you bet your copics that I'm going to wear blue or mint green or maybe even pink because screw you past self, all my life has been "i hate you" or "i hate the way this is" but not anymore because god damn it I deserve this, I deserve a lot after what I've been through and whoever says that I don't well my good sir or madame then that's your opinion. And I won't stop you from thinking that way. But from my perspective it's all over now, and in all honesty I'm laying all this (iM SO SORRY PEOPLE FROM SCHOOL THAT ARE READING thIS) shit from the past to rest because I don't need it and I never will. Not unless I'm telling my kids or my children's children that I survived a lot.


So to recap, I'm done. And I will forever done and I've never been more proud of myself for doing something like this.

Anyways, thank you to everyone I met in those couple of years I spent with the 67 district. I'm going to be making a new blog for my High School/Personal life experience because why the frick frack not?

So if you wanna keep dealing with my baloney then click on here!

And with that, all you lovely guys, gals, and non-binary pals (thanks Thomas Sanders) I will see you on my other blog.


    - Carolina S.